I received this manifesto in my inbox the other day and thought I would post it here. Perhaps I will find the time to come back and share my thoughts on it at some point. You can visit a blog set up to discuss the manifesto here.

A Magna Carta

for Restoring the Supremacy of

Jesus Christ

a.k.a.

A Jesus Manifesto

for the 21st Century Church

by Leonard Sweet and Frank Viola

Christians have made the gospel about so many things … things other than Christ.

Jesus Christ is the gravitational pull that brings everything together and gives them significance, reality, and meaning. Without him, all things lose their value. Without him, all things are but detached pieces floating around in space.

It is possible to emphasize a spiritual truth, value, virtue, or gift, yet miss Christ . . . who is the embodiment and incarnation of all spiritual truth, values, virtues, and gifts.

Seek a truth, a value, a virtue, or a spiritual gift, and you have obtained something dead.

Seek Christ, embrace Christ, know Christ, and you have touched him who is Life. And in him resides all Truth, Values, Virtues and Gifts in living color. Beauty has its meaning in the beauty of Christ, in whom is found all that makes us lovely and loveable.

What is Christianity? It is Christ. Nothing more. Nothing less. Christianity is not an ideology. Christianity is not a philosophy. Christianity is the “good news” that Beauty, Truth and Goodness are found in a person. Biblical community is founded and found on the connection to that person. Conversion is more than a change in direction; it’s a change in connection. Jesus’ use of the ancient Hebrew word shubh, or its Aramaic equivalent, to call for “repentance” implies not viewing God from a distance, but entering into a relationship where God is command central of the human connection.

In that regard, we feel a massive disconnection in the church today. Thus this manifesto.

We believe that the major disease of the church today is JDD: Jesus Deficit Disorder. The person of Jesus is increasingly politically incorrect, and is being replaced by the language of “justice,” “the kingdom of God,” “values,” and “leadership principles.”

In this hour, the testimony that we feel God has called us to bear centers on the primacy of the Lord Jesus Christ. Specifically . . .

1. The center and circumference of the Christian life is none other than the person of Christ. All other things, including things related to him and about him, are eclipsed by the sight of his peerless worth. Knowing Christ is Eternal Life. And knowing him profoundly, deeply, and in reality, as well as experiencing his unsearchable riches, is the chief pursuit of our lives, as it was for the first Christians. God is not so much about fixing things that have gone wrong in our lives as finding us in our brokenness and giving us Christ.

2. Jesus Christ cannot be separated from his teachings. Aristotle says to his disciples, “Follow my teachings.” Socrates says to his disciples, “Follow my teachings.” Buddha says to his disciples, “Follow my meditations.” Confucius says to his disciples, “Follow my sayings.” Muhammad says to his disciples, “Follow my noble pillars.” Jesus says to his disciples, “Follow me.” In all other religions, a follower can follow the teachings of its founder without having a relationship with that founder. Not so with Jesus Christ. The teachings of Jesus cannot be separated from Jesus himself. Jesus Christ is still alive and he embodies his teachings. It is a profound mistake, therefore, to treat Christ as simply the founder of a set of moral, ethical, or social teaching. The Lord Jesus and his teaching are one. The Medium and the Message are One. Christ is the incarnation of the Kingdom of God and the Sermon on the Mount.

3. God’s grand mission and eternal purpose in the earth and in heaven centers in Christ . . . both the individual Christ (the Head) and the corporate Christ (the Body). This universe is moving towards one final goal – the fullness of Christ where He shall fill all things with himself. To be truly missional, then, means constructing one’s life and ministry on Christ. He is both the heart and bloodstream of God’s plan. To miss this is to miss the plot; indeed, it is to miss everything.

4. Being a follower of Jesus does not involve imitation so much as it does implantation and impartation. Incarnation–the notion that God connects to us in baby form and human touch—is the most shocking doctrine of the Christian religion. The incarnation is both once-and-for-all and ongoing, as the One “who was and is to come” now is and lives his resurrection life in and through us. Incarnation doesn’t just apply to Jesus; it applies to every one of us. Of course, not in the same sacramental way. But close. We have been given God’s “Spirit” which makes Christ “real” in our lives. We have been made, as Peter puts it, “partakers of the divine nature.” How, then, in the face of so great a truth can we ask for toys and trinkets? How can we lust after lesser gifts and itch for religious and spiritual thingys? We’ve been touched from on high by the fires of the Almighty and given divine life. A life that has passed through death – the very resurrection life of the Son of God himself. How can we not be fired up?

To put it in a question: What was the engine, or the accelerator, of the Lord’s amazing life? What was the taproot or the headwaters of his outward behavior? It was this: Jesus lived by an indwelling Father. After his resurrection, the passage has now moved. What God the Father was to Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ is to you and to me. He’s our indwelling Presence, and we share in the life of Jesus’ own relationship with the Father. There is a vast ocean of difference between trying to compel Christians to imitate Jesus and learning how to impart an implanted Christ. The former only ends up in failure and frustration. The latter is the gateway to life and joy in our daying and our dying. We stand with Paul: “Christ lives in me.” Our life is Christ. In him do we live, breathe, and have our being. “What would Jesus do?” is not Christianity. Christianity asks: “What is Christ doing through me … through us? And how is Jesus doing it?” Following Jesus means “trust and obey” (respond), and living by his indwelling life through the power of the Spirit.

5. The “Jesus of history” cannot be disconnected from the “Christ of faith.” The Jesus who walked the shores of Galilee is the same person who indwells the church today. There is no disconnect between the Jesus of Mark’s Gospel and the incredible, all-inclusive, cosmic Christ of Paul’s letter to the Colossians. The Christ who lived in the first century has a pre-existence before time. He also has a post-existence after time. He is Alpha and Omega, Beginning and End, A and Z, all at the same time. He stands in the future and at the end of time at the same moment that He indwells every child of God. Failure to embrace these paradoxical truths has created monumental problems and has diminished the greatness of Christ in the eyes of God’s people.

6. It’s possible to confuse “the cause” of Christ with the person of Christ. When the early church said “Jesus is Lord,” they did not mean “Jesus is my core value.” Jesus isn’t a cause; he is a real and living person who can be known, loved, experienced, enthroned and embodied. Focusing on his cause or mission doesn’t equate focusing on or following him. It’s all too possible to serve “the god” of serving Jesus as opposed to serving him out of an enraptured heart that’s been captivated by his irresistible beauty and unfathomable love. Jesus led us to think of God differently, as relationship, as the God of all relationship.

7. Jesus Christ was not a social activist nor a moral philosopher. To pitch him that way is to drain his glory and dilute his excellence. Justice apart from Christ is a dead thing. The only battering ram that can storm the gates of hell is not the cry of Justice, but the name of Jesus. Jesus Christ is the embodiment of Justice, Peace, Holiness, Righteousness. He is the sum of all spiritual things, the “strange attractor” of the cosmos. When Jesus becomes an abstraction, faith loses its reproductive power. Jesus did not come to make bad people good. He came to make dead people live.

8. It is possible to confuse an academic knowledge or theology about Jesus with a personal knowledge of the living Christ himself. These two stand as far apart as do the hundred thousand million galaxies. The fullness of Christ can never be accessed through the frontal lobe alone. Christian faith claims to be rational, but also to reach out to touch ultimate mysteries. The cure for a big head is a big heart.

Jesus does not leave his disciples with CliffsNotes for a systematic theology. He leaves his disciples with breath and body.

Jesus does not leave his disciples with a coherent and clear belief system by which to love God and others. Jesus gives his disciples wounds to touch and hands to heal.

Jesus does not leave his disciples with intellectual belief or a “Christian worldview.” He leaves his disciples with a relational faith.

Christians don’t follow a book. Christians follow a person, and this library of divinely inspired books we call “The Holy Bible” best help us follow that person. The Written Word is a map that leads us to The Living Word. Or as Jesus himself put it, “All Scripture testifies of me.” The Bible is not the destination; it’s a compass that points to Christ, heaven’s North Star.

The Bible does not offer a plan or a blueprint for living. The “good news” was not a new set of laws, or a new set of ethical injunctions, or a new and better PLAN. The “good news” was the story of a person’s life, as reflected in The Apostle’s Creed. The Mystery of Faith proclaims this narrative: “Christ has died, Christ has risen, Christ will come again.” The meaning of Christianity does not come from allegiance to complex theological doctrines, but a passionate love for a way of living in the world that revolves around following Jesus, who taught that love is what makes life a success . . . not wealth or health or anything else: but love. And God is love.

9. Only Jesus can transfix and then transfigure the void at the heart of the church. Jesus Christ cannot be separated from his church. While Jesus is distinct from his Bride, he is not separate from her. She is in fact his very own Body in the earth. God has chosen to vest all of power, authority, and life in the living Christ. And God in Christ is only known fully in and through his church. (As Paul said, “The manifold wisdom of God – which is Christ – is known through the ekklesia.”)

The Christian life, therefore, is not an individual pursuit. It’s a corporate journey. Knowing Christ and making him known is not an individual prospect. Those who insist on flying life solo will be brought to earth, with a crash. Thus Christ and his church are intimately joined and connected. What God has joined together, let no person put asunder. We were made for life with God; our only happiness is found in life with God. And God’s own pleasure and delight is found therein as well.

10. In a world which sings, “Oh, who is this Jesus?” and a church which sings, “Oh, let’s all be like Jesus,” who will sing with lungs of leather, “Oh, how we love Jesus!”

If Jesus could rise from the dead, we can at least rise from our bed, get off our couches and pews, and respond to the Lord’s resurrection life within us, joining Jesus in what he’s up to in the world. We call on others to join us—not in removing ourselves from planet Earth, but to plant our feet more firmly on the Earth while our spirits soar in the heavens of God’s pleasure and purpose. We are not of this world, but we live in this world for the Lord’s rights and interests. We, collectively, as the ekklesia of God, are Christ in and to this world.

May God have a people on this earth who are a people of Christ, through Christ, and for Christ. A people of the cross. A people who are consumed with God’s eternal passion, which is to make his Son preeminent, supreme, and the head over all things visible and invisible. A people who have discovered the touch of the Almighty in the face of his glorious Son. A people who wish to know only Christ and him crucified, and to let everything else fall by the wayside. A people who are laying hold of his depths, discovering his riches, touching his life, and receiving his love, and making HIM in all of his unfathomable glory known to others.

The two of us may disagree about many things—be they ecclesiology, eschatology, soteriology, not to mention economics, globalism and politics.

But in our two most recent books—From Eternity to Here and So Beautiful—we have sounded forth a united trumpet. These books are the Manifests to this Manifesto. They each present the vision that has captured our hearts and that we wish to impart to the Body of Christ— “This ONE THING I know” (Jn.9:25) that is the ONE THING that unites us all:

Jesus the Christ.

Christians don’t follow Christianity; Christians follow Christ.

Christians don’t preach themselves; Christians proclaim Christ.

Christians don’t point people to core values; Christians point people to the cross.

Christians don’t preach about Christ: Christians preach Christ.

Over 300 years ago a German pastor wrote a hymn that built around the Name above all names:

Ask ye what great thing I know,

that delights and stirs me so?
What the high reward I win?

Whose the name I glory in?
Jesus Christ, the crucified.

This is that great thing I know;

this delights and stirs me so:
faith in him who died to save,

His who triumphed o’er the grave:
Jesus Christ, the crucified.

—

Jesus Christ – the crucified, resurrected, enthroned, triumphant, living Lord.

He is our Pursuit, our Passion, and our Life.

Amen.

Who does theology? In short, everyone does! And everyone is a theologian, even those who never realize it! Any thought that is related to the ultimate questions in life is inherently theological. Someone might say, “I have my Bible and the Holy Spirit. I pray to my God and He talks to me. I don’t need theology!” However, the irony is this: not only did that person just issue a deeply theological thought in denouncing theology, but also he/she underwent a profound theological process, one that was likely shaped by years of experiences and theological indoctrination, in order to arrive at his/her conclusion. There is no way to escape theology. You have done it, you are doing it, and you will continue to do it. Hopefully that is not disappointing to hear. Here is the good news for us to hear: We’re all invited! We all belong to the process of doing theology.

How is theology done? Well, that can become a complicated answer. However, here is a starting point. The difference between the most brilliant theologian and you or me or good-old Sister Jones in our church back home is a difference of degree, not kind. In other words, the most sophisticated theological thought may be theology on a different level, but it is still the same basic theological questions that all of us ask. The professional theologian, in her/his years of study, has not so much expanded into new areas of inquiry, as simply perfected and deepened the fundamentals. Hopefully discipleship has introduced you to these fundamentals. And if you choose to do so, you will find that you can explore them the rest of your life.

Is all theology created equally? No. Certainly there are plenty of examples of theology poorly done. Since you will do theology whether you want to or not, why not choose to do it well? After all, doing theology well is a biblical doctrine (instruction). In any professional field—business, sports, politics, etc.—there are a few individuals, groups, and organizations that have risen to the very top. When you ask these professionals how they got there you normally here the same basic response: “I (or we) continued to focus on the basics of the business, the fundamentals of the game.” Obviously theology is not a competition. However, it seems that you and I, and the church in general, could learn from the wisdom of these successful persons. We must commit ourselves to sound doctrine, and then diligently work on those fundamentals for the rest of our lives. This, in my mind anyway, is a trustworthy approach to the confusion of our times.

I am an R.P.M. (Recovering Professional Minister), and I have a few confessions to make. I have been working as a teacher in public school for a little over a year now. I have also become a normal member of a large church with no “official” ministry responsibilities. The experience has helped me recognize several misconceptions and misunderstandings that I had about life as an average American church goer. So, here’s a few confessions.

(1) As a professional minister I was distracted by the crises that arise in people’s lives, as well as demanding personalities. Because of this the majority of my time was taken up by unusual circumstances. I worked hard as a minister, but I was mostly out of touch with the average Christian’s life. Interestingly, public school has helped me see this. It has become evident to me that in public school teachers’ time and energy (as well as state and federal funding) is mostly taken up by the top 5-10% and bottom 5-10% of the student population. It is your average student (80-90% of the school population) that is losing out. Because of this it often seems that teachers are working harder than ever, and your average students are getting less and less from those teachers’ efforts than ever. Unfortunately, the same is often true in ministry.

(2) As a minister the personal and spiritual demands were often overwhelming. Nonetheless, there were always certain flexibilities that are just not options for most working adults. Because of this I was out of touch with what I was really asking of members when putting together special events and ongoing classes and asking people to commit to them. I had no idea how difficult it was for most members to find more time in their schedules.

(3) I thought content was much more valuable than it really is. As “Joe Member” I have come to realize that the things that build me up and feed me in church have very little to do with church service programming and sermon content. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying those things are useless. But I’m fed much more by simply being around the people in my church. I’m thinking of things like the conversations in the hallway and parking lot, the intangible feeling of gathering with others in one place, and the overall sense of community that grows out of those things.

(4) I had no idea what I was trying to prepare people for when they returned home and prepared to return to work. This one is tricky, because as a minister you face all kinds of difficult situations. So, you sort of slip into an assumption that you can speak with authority to how people should deal with the “less difficult” situations of the work place. However, those situations, though often less critical, are no less difficult and demanding. I had no idea how to help people deal with ups and downs of spending 40-hours a week with an assortment of colleagues who have a wide variety of personalities.

(5) I had a hard time knowing what “spreading the Light in your workplace” really meant. And so I did a poor job of equipping people for life in the world.

I have a few friends who are currently shopping around for post-graduate programs, and all of them are at least considering a Doctorate of Ministry. Considering the fact that I’m fresh out of one myself I figured I would give a quick plug for the D.Min. program at Drew University. Here are the top five reasons that I believe I made the best choice for my doctoral work in ministry.

(1) Quality – I first became familiar with Drew when I was preparing to do post-graduate work in either biblical studies or theology as a seminary student. Drew has renowned scholars in just about every conceivable area of biblical and theological studies. Consider this list: Danna Nolan Fewell (Hebrew Bible), Stephen D. Moore (New Testament), Catherine Keller (Constructive & Feminist Theology), Leonard Sweet (Evangelism and Homiletics), and Thomas C. Oden (Theology — retired in 2004, now Faculty Emeritus). That reads like a Who’s Who list, not to mention the other members of the faculty, many of whom I encountered once I began my studies.

(2) Flexibility – I entered into the Global/Online–Ministerial Leadership program. I did a four-week residency during my three-year program. Everything else was done online. Within my cohort a wide range of faith traditions, experience, age, ethnicity, and time zones were represented. The flexibility of online learning allowed us to connect from all around the world.

(3) Relevance – In too many cases D.Min. programs have become something of a Ph.D.-Light, a scaled-down version of a Ph.D. In such cases students are asked to conduct their learning as if they were Ph.D. students, but with smaller papers, shorter hurdles, and a quicker duration. In contrast to this mentality Drew has made a concerted effort to envision and create a program that equips ministers for relevant ministry in the world. Near the end of my program I transitioned from a traditional ministry context (missionary in the Czech Republic) to a non-traditional ministry context (public school teacher in the USA). Amazingly, I have found that the skills and training I received at Drew have equipped me as much for the latter context as it did for the former.

(4) Innovation – Research is often identified as being either quantitative or qualitative. Yet, Drew has pioneered new ground that transcends this false dichotomy, and is best laid out by Carl Savage and William Presnell in Narrative Research in Ministry. Drew’s model incorporates both quantitative and qualitative elements in research, but offers more than a blended model. Narrative Research in Ministry truly develops a third way, which seeks to discover hidden narratives through collaborative story-brokering within faith communities. The results are clearer understandings of the shared stories within faith communities that lead to a deeper sense of corporate identity within its members.

(5) Affordability – While the things already mentioned warrant a high price tag, I found out that Drew’s D.Min. program is more than competitive with its pricing. In fact, it was significantly more affordable than almost all of the other programs that I was considering before making my choice.

I guess you can get the picture at this point that I could not be any happier with my doctoral experience than I was at Drew. I would encourage anyone considering D.Min. programs to take a serious look at their D.Min. program.

Well, once I defended my dissertation a few weeks ago I slipped into a much-needed virtual-realm-lethargy! And man did it feel nice! I now have 500+ emails in my inbox, dozens of Facebook wall posts and messages to reply to, a barren Twitter page, and a few silent weeks on the blog. After this vacation I’m now roaring to go!

One of the things that finally re-energized me out of hibernation was the acceptance that I am no longer a “professional minister.” Sure I still hold credentials. And I will always be passionately involved in the work of the Body of Christ. But I do not receive compensation for ministry, which frees me up to focus on ministry that grows out of God-given passions, and not out of a need to justify my paycheck each month. So how do I pay the bills? I’m a middle school teacher. And I’m happy about that!

Along with my vocational acceptance comes a revamping of my blog topics. For the last several months I have written almost exclusively on areas of theology, spirituality, and the church. While I’m sure that I will still write on those things, I think that I need to share my whole life on here. That means venturing into things like sports, politics, or just everyday life stuff. I’m pretty stoked about it. So, let me start by introducing myself, “Hi, I’m Jonathan. I’m a middle school teacher, husband for seven years, father of two girls, with a son on the way.”

The epidemic of adolescent obesity in the USA has been increasingly documented in recent years. Recent statistics indicate that 32 percent, or nearly 1 out of every 3 children in the USA is overweight. Alongside the rise of the average weight has been a surge of Type 2 diabetes in adolescents and pre-adolescents. Overeating causes the pancreas to produce extra insulin, which helps break down sugar from foods. Over time this overexposure to insulin causes the body to become less responsive to insulin, resulting in diabetes. While overeating in general can cause this to happen, the intake of food with high sugar content certainly exacerbates the process.

Against the backdrop of this crisis of the teenager’s physical health I wish to raise questions about the possibility of a crisis of the teenager’s spiritual health. Have we as youth ministers been feeding our students the wrong types of food in the wrong quantities? Have we exacerbated the problem by topping off large portions with sugary treats? If so, what might be the proper treatment for spiritual diabetes of the teenage soul?

Young Americans today come to our churches in the midst of fast-paced lives. Even if those young persons are not busy with sports, academics, clubs, and programs they are still surrounded by flashing images on TV, instant communication with friends, immediate access to information from the Internet, and food that can be prepared in 2-3 minutes. The variety of things to choose from for an American teenager seems infinite, and so the tastes from one teen to another might vary greatly. Nonetheless, there is a good chance that whatever it is that a teen prefers to do, or to have, or to be, s/he likes it in large portions. This has led many youth ministers to serve up an eclectic mix of offerings in their youth programs, and to do so in big amounts. Often a youth ministry will brand itself with a name that reflects its attempt to super-size the service. Identities like Extreme, High-Impact, Energy, Radical, and Explosion are common (though I see no problem with such names in-and-of themselves). Whatever strategies beyond entertainment and fun that might be intended are not always clear. It is even less clear whether or not these approaches are shaping the teenage soul in a healthy way.

What constitutes healthy spiritual food for the teenage soul?

A little over a week ago we were discussing the issue of pride in our Wednesday night men’s group. The individual leading the discussion was talking about the ways in which pride and love are almost complete opposites. As he was talking it occurred to me that I might do myself a favor and write an inverted, converse version of 1 Cor 13. I found the exercise to be powerful and spiritually rewarding, and I have intended to post it here since. So, here it is:

If I Speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have pride, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.

And if I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have pride, I am nothing.

And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I deliver my body to be burned, but have pride, it profits me nothing.

Pride is impatient, pride is cruel, and it is jealous; pride brags about itself and is arrogant, acts unbecomingly; it seeks its own, is easily provoked, remembers all the wrongs ever done to it, rejoices in unrighteousness, but does not rejoice with the truth;

bears nothing, believes nothing, hopes nothing, endures nothing. Pride always fails;

and if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away. For we know in part, and we prophesy in part; but when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away.

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, thought as a child, reasoned as a child; I would have become a man, but I did not put away my childish things.

Now we only see part of our pride through hazy lenses, but one day we will see it face to face; now I understand my pride in part, but then I will know it fully just as it is fully known to God.

Now doubt, fear, and pride seem to never go away; but the worst of these is pride.

If you have not already checked it out I highly recommend that you read this post from Jonathan Martin regarding the discussions and vote on the issue of gender-inclusive Church & Pastor’s Councils in the CoG. Jonathan shares his reasonable views passionately, and tells about one of the most explosive scenes on the General Assembly floor in recent years. It was truly a source of encouragement for me.

With a silent blog for a week one might assume I was at the International General Assembly of the Church of God this week. The truth is that it was my middle school job, and not my denomination that arrested my time this week. It sounds like I missed quite an historic meeting in Texas. Since G.A. wrap-ups currently abound in the CoG Blogosphere I will not try to do my own version here. But if you’d like to read some good ones I recommend reading this or this or this for starters.

One thing that is noticeably absent from most of the reflections that I have read is the thing that I consider to be the biggest disappointment of the meeting. That is, the failure to pass the resolution to allow women on Church and Pastor’s Council in the local church. In my opinion the outcome of this vote does not accurately reflect the predominant sentiment of the majority of Ordained Bishop’s in the CoG, but until we open ourselves up to something like internet voting I will never know if I am right about that. I also recognize that in many ways this rule forces virtually no restriction on me or any other potential pastor in the denomination. A local church does not have to even have a Church and Pastor’s Council. Furthermore, it can be governed by any council agreed upon by the church, and as long as that church does not give said council the name “Church and Pastor’s Council” it can be 100% female.

Nonetheless, tonight my therapist is grieving, and I’m reminded again that I am not even half of the therapeutic presence for her that she always is for me. I’m sad tonight because I don’t know how to comfort the daughters, mothers and sisters of our denomination. Emily is an Ordained Minister in the CoG. She spent much of her life reared in the denomination’s flagship church, and most of the rest of it in that church’s most famous church plant. She was educated in the denomination’s flagship training institutions–Lee University and the Church of God Theological Seminary. Even her Ph.D. program at the University of Wales is being guided by one of the CoG’s most famous biblical scholars. She is a direct descendant of R.G. Spurling, the founder of the CoG, and the mother of two 7th generation CoG daughters. Her experience in each of those places led her to believe that our denomination viewed her one way, but slightly more than half of the one thousand O.B.’s able to stand on the floor of the General Assembly this past week just told her something completely different.

I’ve heard people talk about the CoG as if it were a family. I’m glad they have experienced it that way. I have heard people who attended this General Assembly express genuine “love bursts” as they talked about healing and change that happened in Texas. I’m glad they experienced it that way. As for me, I don’t feel like much of a family with the CoG. Not when it continues to slap my real family around. Do I really want to raise my daughters in such an environment? I know we talk about all getting along with different opinions, and speak of having rich cultural diversity. But does it really make sense for someone like myself to stay, knowing that I will have to continue to watch the one’s I love get so hurt? That’s not a rhetorical question. I honestly wonder if it would be best not just for me, but for the CoG as well, if we just slipped out the door and found a movement where we could actually compare our experience with our denomination with our rich experiences with our families. Better for me for obvious reasons. Better for the CoG because it would not have to worry about its wounded daughters. Out of sight, out of mind…as the saying goes. Since the daughters are obviously already out of heart, why not seal the deal and exit the house altogether?

Our house is indeed too small. I can handle cramped quarters. But anyone has a natural flight reflex once suffocation begins.

My therapist points out that we always wonder why some spouses stay in abusive relationships, and then asks me with teary eyes why she should stay in the CoG. Why would she stay? Why would any of them stay? Why?